Prostate Massage Guide: Techniques, Safety, and Tips for Beginners

Some blokes swear by it, others blush at the mention—prostate massage is one of those topics loaded with curiosity and myths. You’ve probably seen wild claims about earth-shattering pleasure, improved bedroom stamina, or even life-changing health boosts. So, what’s real, what’s hype, and—if you’re ready to try it—how do you even start? Let’s be honest: plenty of guys have questions but don’t exactly feel like asking their GP or their mates at the pub. Here’s everything you’ve wanted to know (and some stuff you maybe didn’t expect) about getting started with prostate massage.

What Is Prostate Massage, and Why Do People Do It?

First, let’s clear up exactly what we’re talking about. The prostate is a small, walnut-sized gland inside the male pelvis, just under the bladder. Its main job is making seminal fluid, but sometimes it gets press for different, slightly more fun reasons. Prostate massage means gently stimulating this gland, usually through the anus, to generate pleasurable sensations—sometimes intense orgasms—and for a few other reasons tied to health.

Research shows prostate stimulation can boost sexual pleasure, and for some blokes, it’s the gateway to what’s called a “prostate orgasm.” That’s not just a regular climax—it can be longer, more intense, and often hits different parts of the body. But it’s not just about feeling good. Medical practitioners have used prostate massage in some cases to help with prostatitis (pain or swelling in the gland) or to help release blocked fluid. While modern medicine has mostly moved toward antibiotics and other treatments, some men report actual relief and better urinary flow when used appropriately—just don’t see it as a standalone treatment for any prostate issue.

Quick fun fact: in a 2023 global sex survey, about 18% of men in Australia under 40 said they’d tried prostate massage at least once. That’s more than doubled in just ten years. As stigmas shrink, more guys are exploring it openly, so you’re definitely not the only one curious. Below, there’s a handy table summarising what a lot of men say they get out of prostate massage:

Some doctors still caution that evidence is patchy when it comes to cancer prevention or long-term health, so take the more miraculous claims with a grain of salt. Think of prostate massage like any other kind of sensual activity: what you get from it is a mix of mind, body, and whatever you bring to the table.

Getting Started: Tools, Preparation, and Mindset

The single most common question is, “How do you even start?” You’re not alone if you find the thought a little daunting. But a bit of prep goes a long way. First up, hygiene. Wash your hands, trim your nails (seriously – snaggy nails are not your friend), and go to the bathroom before you begin. You want a clear, calm mind, so choose a time when you’re not rushed, stressed, or worried about being interrupted.

Next, lube. This is non-negotiable. Anal tissue is delicate, and friction is the enemy of good vibes. Go for a water-based lubricant (easy to clean, safe with condoms and most toys). Never try it dry or with random household products.

Let’s talk about positions. Solo, lying on your back with knees up is common, or you might go on your side with knees pulled up—use whatever feels right and gives you access. Some people kneel or squat, too. If you’re with a partner, communication is key: talk about comfort, fears, and boundaries before a finger even enters the picture.

A quick word on toys: you don’t have to buy a prostate massager on day one. A clean, gloved, lubed finger works just fine for beginners. If you’re curious later, go for body-safe silicone toys designed specifically for prostate stimulation—they're curved to find the gland and have a flared base for safety (so nothing gets lost!). Many are affordable, waterproof, and sometimes come with vibration for increased pleasure.

• Wash hands and prep your space
• Use plenty of suitable lubricant
• Find a comfortable, private position
• Start with slow, gentle touch—explore don’t rush
• Breathe deeply and relax muscles (especially the pelvic floor)
• Be patient—getting enjoyably comfortable can take time

Here’s a thing most people don’t realise: your mental state can really affect the experience. If you’re anxious or embarrassed, your body tenses up and sensation drops. This is why solo exploration first (even if you’ve got a willing partner) is a smart move. If it feels awkward, that’s normal—almost every guy feels a bit self-conscious at first. But with patience, awkward will fade.

Techniques: How To Perform Prostate Massage

Right, let’s get into the “how.” The key word here is gentle. Never jab or press suddenly—prostate massage is about finesse, not force. Here’s how you can approach it:

1. Begin by applying plenty of lube to your finger (and to your anus). Start by relaxing and massaging the area outside in gentle circles. Gentle is the name of the game—you want to avoid discomfort or pain.
2. When ready, slowly insert your well-lubed finger, a tiny bit at a time. Take your time—give your body a chance to adjust. If there’s resistance, back off and take deep breaths.
3. Once inside, aim your finger towards your belly button (upwards if you’re lying on your back). About 5–7cm in, you'll feel something that feels a little like a smooth, rubbery bump (most describe it like the size and feel of a plum stone). That’s the prostate.
4. Use slow, gentle “come here” motions or small circles over the prostate. Some men like light tapping or tapping in a rhythm. It shouldn’t hurt—if it does, stop immediately.
5. Many start by alternating between external perineum massage (the bit of skin between scrotum and anus) and internal touch, allowing arousal to build naturally. No need to race for climax; explore what feels good for you.

Some tips: Don’t focus just on the prostate; whole pelvic stimulation builds relaxation and pleasure. Try deep, relaxed breathing—people report more sensation when they sink into the feeling, rather than forcing anything to happen.

If you want to combine it with traditional masturbation or have a partner involved, go for it. For lots of men, that extra arousal helps cross the mental barrier, making sensations more pleasurable and less weird (if it feels weird at all).

What about safety? Avoid sharp fingernails and never force anything. Bleeding, sharp pain, fever, or anything seriously uncomfortable means stop, and if things don’t clear up—call a doctor, no shame in it. Sexually transmitted infections can spread through any anal play, so always use gloves or protection if with a partner, and clean toys properly with warm water and antibacterial soap after each use.

Moving Beyond the Basics: Mixing Technique with Health and Pleasure

Now that you know how, let’s talk about why some people keep doing this regularly. Sure, the pleasure is a big draw, but regular prostate massage is also claimed by some men to help with prostate drainage, reduce discomfort from chronic prostatitis (especially in combo with medical treatment), and even improve ejaculation control. There’s growing conversation around it being included as part of a self-care routine, especially in places where sexual wellness is less stigmatised.

For couples, adding prostate stimulation to your sexual routine can shake up bedroom habits in a good way. It can build trust, increase communication, and bring a new level of connection—especially if you tackle the weirdness upfront and laugh about nerves together. Partners exploring this together often report a boost in intimacy and less pressure on either person to ‘perform’ a certain way.

Curious about equipment? Once you’re comfortable, you can try prostate massagers—they come in all shapes, with or without vibration. Look for reputable brands and check online reviews, especially from Australian users. Don’t go for cheap unbranded products; poor-quality toys are not worth the risk. And remember: always clean up carefully, store toys in a dust-free bag, and don’t share unless you use protection.

Here’s something loads of newcomers forget: if you do experience discomfort the day after, that’s often just your muscles saying “that was new.” If symptoms are mild and fade in a day, you’re fine—just go even gentler next time. If you ever notice blood in your urine or anything persistent, check in with a doctor. No sense risking your health for curiosity’s sake.

And what about all those myths: can prostate massage prevent cancer? The science is mixed. There’s zero evidence it increases risk, but don’t take up this habit for cancer prevention. Likewise, don’t rely on it if you have known prostate issues—get real medical advice. But for pleasure, for exploring your body, or for shaking up a stale routine, there are loads of reasons plenty of Adelaide blokes and beyond are open to giving it a go. If you do, start small, go slow, and remember—the first step is always just getting comfortable with trying something new.